Thursday, 14 April 2011

CASTE-SYSTEM IN INDIA - A Perspective in modern context


Somehow I got to read a note "Brahman hi doshi kyon" by Jeet Sharma Manav . I found his perspective a little personal and thus felt the need of sharing my point of view with him & his friends who commented on his note.

Generally, when we present a point of view, it needs to be more general and broad, keeping the facts right. It is not about one person, it is about how this opinion got formed. When an opinion gets formed, it is not because of one person's good or bad deed but what the majority contributes in order to give such an impression.  We all know there are four main castes recognized by traditional Hindu society based primarily on hereditary occupation: Brahmin, Kshatriya, Vaishya & Sudras.

If we go back to history or history after independence, the educated & knowledgeable class (Brahmins, Kshatriya , Bhumiyars, Kayasthas and to a certain extent Vaishyas i.e. business class) were the ones who ruled or controlled the society and country in general. Brahmins were considered to be shastra-gyani, Kshatriya to be warriors, Bhumiyars to be land lords, and last but not the least Kayasthas to be intellectual or service class. Being educated and well-informed, most of the departments including governance went into the hands of the so-called forward class. Somehow, those that belonged to the ‘backward class’ were left neglected.

Before going into the human psyche, I would like to quote two different points of view given by Lord Krishna and Manu respectively. In the Gita, Lord Krishna says in Chapter 4 verse 13 " The fourfold caste has been created by Me according to the differentiation of Guna and Karma." Chapter 18, verse 40 the Lord says," There is no being on earth, or again in heaven among the gods, that is liberated from the three qualities born of Nature.(tamas, rajas & sattva)" In verse 41 of chapter 18, He again says, "Of Brahamanas, Kshatriyas and Vaishyas, as also the Sudras, O Arjuna, the duties are distributed according to the qualities born of their own nature." In contrast, Manu made the classification based on family lineage and hereditary occupation. It was enforced through a rigid code of conduct that was specific to each class and rooted in the dharmashastras of the later Vedic period. 

As the  time passes by, we are seeing the distorted version of not only the caste system but also certain practices like dowry, sati, superstition etc. Things which began with the intention of serving society & protecting the poor became the tool of exploitation. With globalization in modern times, we are realizing that we actually can live without a caste system.  But the question is will it be that easy for people to let the control go so easily? We have ruled for hundreds of years and thus it has become the part of our psyche to be authoritative and ruthless. We all have taken advantage of the weaker and vulnerable at some point of time in our lives. Success and power blind us. The society that we are seeing today is actually the by-product of our own doings. Whenever, we have power in our hands we either treated the poor, shudras, or untouchables as insects or exploited their feelings for our own advantage. For example V.P. Singh further divided the already divided India on caste based reservation on the name of being the saviour of the backward class . Similarly, on the name of puja-paath and to meet their own ends meet, Brahmins made the society superstitious. The same applies to Rajputs & Bhumiyars, who used their bravery, power & richness to exploit the poor.  We still have bonded labourers in the villages working for them.  This all is still happening because of our old mindset passed on to us from generations. Our sense of being superior in mindset creates a hierarchy of superior/inferior on the basis of caste.

We forget that every person is born equally worthy, a spiritual being with a physical body, a child of God and a child of man. Every person is born dependent on others to fulfill their vital physical and psychological human needs - just as food, air and water are vital human needs, so, also are love, truth, unity and most of all, human dignity.

Now when the tables have been turned and we see Mayawati, Mulayam Singh Yadav, and Lalu Yadav coming in power on the name of Dalit and doing the same thing which their contemporary high caste colleagues are doing, we wonder. What surprises me is our own stupid belief of expecting them to turn into some kind of Messiah for the poor and the destitutes. We forget that human psyche never changes. The same psyche of being powerful and ruthless actually work - the sense of superiority compel them to do what they are doing.  How many people coming from poor or destitute backgrounds have served the society (very few - we always can find exceptions)? They themselves are busy in making money and making themselves powerful. 

So to conclude, we can say that there are actually two castes only - the rich and the poor, the ruler & the ruled, the oppressor and the oppressed. But things are changing. People are realizing the power of education and trying to empower themselves with knowledge.  It will take some time but eventually the change will come.



Tuesday, 8 March 2011

EUTHANASIA - THE STORY OF ARUNA SHANBAUG


Some of you must be watching the debate that arose from the petition filed for euthanasia by Pinki Virani for Aruna Shanbaug in the Supreme Court.  Because of this petition, we came to know the story of Aruna Shanbaug, a lady who is lying down on a hospital bed in a vegetative state from last 37 yrs..  For those of you who have not followed the story, " Aruna was a nurse, working in King Memorial Hospital, Parel, Mumbai. On the night of 27th Nov 1973, Walmiki, a ward boy at the hospital, attacked her while she was changing her clothes in the hospital basement. He choked her with a dog chain and sodomized her. The asphyxiation cut off oxygen supply to her brain resulting in brain stem contusion injury and cervical cord injury apart from leaving her cortically blind. At that time Aruna was only 25. Now she is 62.   To read her story, plz go to this link http://hubpages.com/hub/Rape-In-Revenge

            A heart rending story.....even the thought of such cruelty and helplessness makes me shudder...Now there are various aspects to look at in this story.. emotional, practical and philosophical. The Supreme court has denied the euthanasia plea but has allowed passive euthanasia where one can withdraw supplying food to the patient under the supervision of the doctors in certain circumstances. Some people are in favour of Euthanasia and some are not. Though few countries like Netherland, Belgium, Switzerland have allowed euthanasia, India is still struggling with this concept. Some think India is not mature enough to handle this issue and once allowed can be misused by people. Some think Our scripture allows "iksha mrityu" then why not the law of the country. If we have the right to live with dignity then why not to die with dignity. Living a life of a vegetable is not what one can call life. While permitting euthanasia the conditions & circumstances can be outlined, so that people cannot misuse it for their material benefit.

            Secondly, Aruna's condition compelled me to think about the philosophy of karma. And when it comes to the philosophy of karma, then the question arises - was Aruna suffering because of her bad karma? Was what  happened to her pre-destined?  What kind of learning was she experiencing  while in a vegetable state?  According to dharma, the  law of nature balances everything that we do in our past & present life.  Looking at that theory,  was Aruna paying the debt of her previous karma? According to Brian Weiss , an American Psychiatrist , we all come in body form to learn our lessons, so it is better to finish off that learning and then go, otherwise we will have to come back to finish the remaining  lessons. In that case we should not permit euthanasia because if birth is not in our hands, then death shouldn't be either. But how can one see a person suffering in a vegetative state? What if they don't get care? Do they then not have the right to die with dignity.  Someone was saying that a reference of iksha-mrityu is mentioned in Ramayana. Can anyone shed some light on it?

To know  Aruna emotionally, plz visit http://mvvyasmamta.blogspot.com/2011/03/blog-post_08.html

At the end, how cruel destiny could be to Aruna - a young, pretty, and ambitious girl, coming to Mumbai from a small town Haldipur, Uttar Kannada, Karnataka, working in KEM hospital, fell in love with a young doctor, got engaged and about to get married and all of a sudden her life cord was cut short  by this devil called Walmiki and she turns into a living corpse.  Is this what we call MAYA?

Saturday, 26 February 2011

INTER-FAITH MARRIAGE


When I said in my  article "Marriage" that I am not pro for inter-faith marriage, I did not mean that I am against inter-faith marriage. As we all know, we are now living in a multi-cultural society where we are exposed to different cultures , ethnicities, communities and groups. Children study or work together and thus tend to get attracted towards other cultures and look for alliances for a better future. For some, it works and for some, it doesn't.  Here, I will explore the reasons of its failure. This is my exploration, and it is possible that it may not match with yours. Separation/divorces are common in every kind of marriage these days, be it arranged, or love, or inter-faith. Before going any further I would like to quote Tolstoy ," यह कहना कि तुम एक व्यक्ति को आजीवन प्रेम करते रहोगे . यह कहने के समान है कि एक मोमबत्ती जब तक तुम चाहोगे , तब तक जलती रहेगी ". :)

In olden times, marriage was considered between 2 families instead of 2 individuals. As a result, people generally verified the roots & values of the families. It was believed that similarities bring less friction and conflicts. Recently, I was listening to a talk given by a man born in Canada to immigrant parents, who married a Caucasian girl. He was happy until one fine day after a year or so she came to him and said, " I don't love you anymore and want a divorce." He felt his world toppling. He went into depression and it took him a while to get back to normal life. Why? Why this remorse? This talk compelled me to think of the reasons behind his sadness and why he rejected reality.

Most children who are going to school feel that by getting education and working in the mainstream, speaking like one of the natives, and eating pizza, makes them a native resident. They feel that by accepting the culture and the language, they are Caucasians. Some of them even think that mingling or marrying with their 'own' people is inferior.  What they forget however, is that they are the children of immigrant parents. They have seen their parents struggle through life together, and subconsciously they have imbibed those values pertaining to a successful relationship. They have witnessed their parents' successful marriage which subconsciously has contributed to their psyche. Not only marriage, they also learn or imbibe, knowingly or unknowingly, values, customs, behaviors & so many other things that they witness around them.

Returning to my previous point, I have always maintained that marriage is an acceptance of 2 different families and their backgrounds. However, when children go for inter-faith marriages they don't realize the broad fundamental differences of each other's culture. It may be that for one person parting ways comes as a shock, but for the other it may be considered just a normal part of life. So the acceptance and understanding  of 2 different cultures is very important.   What may be considered abnormal or unethical in one culture may be very normal and ethical in another culture. If you understand this concept and regardless decide to take the risk, then there is no reason for blame when the relationship comes to an end. An Indian friend of mine was married to his American wife for 7 yrs, however, right after the wife gave birth to their daughter, she declared that she was no longer interested in continuing the relationship. He was not an abusive husband, nor was he unemployed, rather he was caring and loving . He tried everything in his power to save the marriage, but nothing worked. At that time, everybody who knew the husband felt that injustice had been done to him. However, if you look at the situation more deeply, it can be considered that the wife is not to blame. She simply followed her heart and thought it to be normal as per her culture. In some cultures, marriage is not considered for life, regardless of the existence of children.

Some of you must have either read the book or watched the movie " Not Without my Daughter," which is based on a real story by Betty Mahmoody. In this story the differences in two people's roots and values are so strong and distinct, that even though they pretended to forget the differences for some time, it eventually hunted them down and destroyed everything that they had falsely created around them. It is a story of an American woman marrying an Iranian man. The man was a doctor by profession - a sophisticated and thorough gentleman who eventually turned into a male chauvinist, took his wife to Iran by promising their return to the states within 2 weeks.  Once In Iran, with his own people the husband became hostile and declared that they were not returning to the United States of America and that she & the daughter will have to live with him and his family in Iran. When the wife confronted him and tried to fight for her freedom and rights, the husband and his family abused her. So eventually we see the family comes into the picture amd makes him succumb to their pressures.

It is not my intention to dwell further into the story of Betty Mahmoody, but I would like to point out that if a person chooses to marry somebody from a different faith, then it is crucial to understand that person's culture, religion, and values thoroughly. Only then, it will be possible to solve misunderstandings. As it is said, marriage is made in heaven, but it is our job to make it work on this earth. We cannot deny the fact that only by birth can one understand the complexities and beauty of one's culture. As outsiders, we can only judge the culture or person, which sometimes can create a world of differences.  It is also said, "what counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility.”

Saturday, 19 February 2011

मेरी बेटी

I wrote this poem on the 16th b'day of my 2nd daughter. I want to dedicate this poem to all those mothers who make the decison for female foeticide at some point in their lives.

१६ साल - जैसे कल की ही बात हो ,
१९९१  - डॉक्टर की घोषणा  - "you are  pregnant"
आकाश जैसे सर पर गिरा हो,
मैं विस्मित , अचरज और उदासी से भरी बैठी सोचती, 
"१० महीने की बेटी गोद में, और अब दूसरी".

फिर मन को समझाया - "बेटा हो गया तो परिवार सम्पूर्ण "
ईश्वर की इच्छा   समझ कर इसे अपनाया
लेकिन फिर डर के एक झोकें ने मुझे सताया
"क्या होगा अगर फिर से बेटी ",
सोच कर दिल बहुत घबराया
डॉक्टर  को मैंने अपना फैसला सुनाया
डॉक्टर को सारा चक्कर समझ में आया
उसने खूब तस्सली से हमें समझाया "और बच्चे भगवान की देन है" ,
कह कर अपना अनुग्रह दोहराया

मैंने उत्सुकता के और-छोर में अपना नौ महीना बिताया
अन्दर से मन बहुत घबराया, और फिर वो वक्त भी आया
१0 मार्च १९९२  - रात के दस बजे ,
जब मेरी बेटी ने दुनिया  में अपना अस्तित्व पाया .
पति की ख़ुशी और बेटी की नाजुकता ने मुझे खुशियों के हिंडोलों   में झुलाया ,
देखते ही देखते मेरी छिपकिली  सी लम्बी और लाल रंग वाली बेटी ने खूबसूरती और प्यार  के अलग -अलग अंदाज़ दिखाएं
और मुझे माँ होने के  सारे गौरव दिलवाएं .
बेटी की समझदार, प्यार और संवेदना से भरपूर बातों ने हमें खूब रूलाया, खूब हंसाया.

अपनी बिटिया के बारी में और क्या कहूं , बस
धन्यवाद करती हूँ उस ईश्वर का जिन्होंने हमें बेटी तो दिया , पर खूब दिया .

Sunday, 16 January 2011

AURAT KE NAYE AAYAAM - औरत के नये आयाम

औरत हूँ मैं    -  घर की साज-सज्जा में अपने आप को पूर्ण समझती
बच्चों के आस-पास रह कर अपनी ममता की किरण बिखेरती
पति की सेवा में ही आनंद की अनुभूति करती  ,
सास- ससुर की अच्छी या कड़वी बातों को ही अपना संसार समझती ,

वही औरत हूँ मैं -  हाँ वही हूँ मैं
पर आज घर की चारदीवारी से बाहर निकल चुकी हूँ मैं
अपनी क्षमता की मिसाल बाहरी दुनिया में साबित कर चुकी हूँ मैं  

अपने माँ होने के एहसास के साथ घर की जिम्मेदारियों का एहसास भी है मुझे
अपने अस्तित्व को अपनी कुशलता  से पूर्ण करने की प्यास है मुझे
कौन सा क्षेत्र  है जहाँ मैंने अपना रंग नहीं जमाया
आदमियों के कंधा से कंधा नहीं मिलाया

मैं अगर एक कोमल एहसास हूँ , तो ज्वाला भी हूँ
सती अन्शुया हूँ , तो निक्की हेली  और इंदिरा नूई भी हूँ .
मैं अगर ताकत हूँ, तो विन्ध्वंश भी हूँ .
मैं गीत हूँ . तो बिजली भी हूँ .

जिन्दंगी के हर चैलेंजे को स्वीकार करने की क्षमता है मुझे
घर-बाहर दोनों को सँभालने की ताकत है मुझे
मेरे इस बदलते तेवर से आदमी ही नही, मैं खुद भी बहुत हैरान हूँ

मैं वो शक्ति हूँ , जो चाहे तो बारिश की बूँद की तरह तृप्त कर दे
और न चाहे तो nuclear bomb की तरह तबाह कर दे .

दोस्तों, मैं दासता के पन्नों से बाहर निकल चुकी हूँ
और आनेवाले समय के लिए इतिहास लिख रही हूँ .

Tuesday, 11 January 2011

MARRIAGE

A friend of ours posted an article about marriage on his blog -  http://gyansrajhans.blogspot.com/2010/10/my-views-on-arranged-marriageslove.html  Here I am posting my reply to that article as I found the subject very interesting.

 I am somehow very passionate about this subject. I recently gave a speech on this topic in a wedding function. I think in modern times, a new definition, a new outlook has been given to marriage. Every passing day, its meaning is changing. It is no more in the boundaries of our scriptures or shastras. Whether the institution of marriage is crumbling or evolving, it is difficult to say. There are people who still believe in this institution but it seems that the youth of today want to experiment with this idea. So, we are seeing different kind of alliances such as arranged marriage, love marriage and inter-faith marriage  There is another one known as Live-in or common-law.

As we all know, there is no set formula for the success of a happy marriage. I never felt that in arranged marriage, the girl & the boy have no say. They are given a choice to select their partners. The only difference may be that they do not go out together before marriage as they do in love marriage. In my view, any type of marriage is marriage after marriage and one has to work on it. It needs not only love, compassion & consideration but a lot of sacrifice & tolerance in order to make it successful, as people coming from two different backgrounds, different upbringing & different values have different outlook & understanding of life. In love marriage, people have the misconception of knowing each other. People's behaviour changes as per the situation & circumstances and then they take it as a blow as they never witnessed this kind of reaction from their partner to whom they thought of "knowing". Any relationship works only when we want it to work.

Still in a way, love marriage has become the demand of the time, but I would like parents to educate their children from their experience to look for a boy or a girl with a good & educated family background because that will constitute the boy's/girl's entire behaviour, his/her moral values etc. Love marriage does not mean to choose whomsoever. It is a question of spending a happy & peaceful life together, so one should see compatibility, education & family.  A person's own upbringing contributes a lot in terms of choosing a partner. I also encourage love marriage especially in India because it is in some way helping to eradicate the dowry system, because of which, well educated and good looking girls cannot get married to the right person and have to compromise as per their parents’ economic condition.

I am not so pro for inter-faith marriages. Marriage in itself is a complex institution, why to make it more complex? But I definitely will discuss the pros & cons of inter faith marriage some other time. Please feel free to drop your comments, it certainly will help me to understand the subject better.

CHUPPI - चुप्पी

This is my first poem...thought of sharing with all of you..

चुप रहना शायद एक अच्छी बात होती है
पर जिन्दंगी की लम्बी दौड़ में ये कई बार घातक भी होती है
ये चुप अगर आपको समस्या से निकालती है
तो कई बार समस्या मैं डालती भी है
जो बात उनके एक बोल से किसी निष्कर्ष पर पहुँच सकती है
वो लम्बे समय तक सरकारी फाइलों के पन्नों में बंद रहती है
चुप अगर प्रसाद है , तो प्रताड़ना भी है
किसी के जिन्दंगी के घुटन या इन्सेकुरिटी  का एहसास भी है
आप चुप जरूर रहें , ये अच्छा   गुण है
पर कृप्या अपने चुप को हथियार की तरह इस्तेमाल न करें